Pepper the fashion dogger – dog boarding.

March 29th, 2011 | M | Bitching and Junkfood News | 1 Comment »

Arf- sayin? So I aint’ been rai’in on the blog for a while innit. Mummy 1(Bitchy Kath) and Mummy 2(Bitchy Marion) was mad busy wiv Urban outfitters and I been distressin denim for a massive order and distressin everyone else too robbin feathers n eatin chicken bones. I was really sick last week innit. I did a vom that looked and smelt like it came from my other end and Mummies thought I was posessed. Then I gave them demon dog white-eye all week like I actually was posessed just to mess with them cause they was under pressure and it was fun to watch them spin out.

Look at me, look at me…..no look at me, look at me, give me attention, look at me, look at me, look at me, I’ll bite ur face innit.

We moved to a new studio. It’s on the street so I can lie in the sunshine all blissed out all day. Mummy 2 was makin trousers all weekend so I came over and sat my bum on her leg. Then she wasn’t givin me nuff attention so I saw my bum on top of what she was makin and started lickin the hammer so she couldn’t bash me wiv it. They all laughed at me and I got loads of attention – bitch knows how to work it, arf.

Last Summer when Mummy 1 went on holidays I realised that I love skateboarding. Mummy 2 brought me for a walk in London Fields and we met a really nice man that had this piece of wood wiv 4 wheels attached. I barked at it cause I thought it was a monster but then he was really nice and he gave me a go on it, all my four staffie paws and I realised I’ve got a natural talent for skateboardin, I like skater boys too cause they have long hair that I can eat and their trainers are stinky.

Mummies are going to be throwing a big party in Urban Outfitters Shoreditch in June, I hope they bring me. I’d luv to chew all the knickers and socks in there and I’m sure there’d be lots of places to bury my bone/dig holes/go mental and do the upside down flippy show where I lie on my back and pretend like I can’t walk any more so they have to drag me along on my lead in front of all the whippet owners who hate Staff’s round here.

Tee hee hee hee – I’m a bold ting.

We’re going dogboarding next week, just like in the video.